And it obviously has to do with the fact that many of the psychiatric / psychology counselling practitioners are themselves in need of the proper counselling. Net-search it and you will see that they have one of the highest occupational suicide rates. There's an old saying: 'You can't help anyone if you don't first help yourself.' But, regardless this pathetic reality, there is competent and compassionate counselling help to be found. You just have to activate your own inner radar to locate them.

You can do it! Your future self will thank you. Do some research into what type of therapists you want and give it a go. It can be scary but so worth it. I regret not picking up the phone and getting help before I did some serious self-sabotaging behavior .

Don't be afraid of taking that step. If you're itching to make that phone call, just do it.

It does feel daunting, BUT you have made the first step in realising that you need help and cant do it on your own.
Ever thought of having an appointment over zoom etc?
I have a good friend who speaks to his counsellor that way.
Good luck to you

It may be uncomfortable at first, but over time you will come to appreciate having a neutral perspective. And hopefully find your counselor gives you interesting perspectives that let you see things in a different light.

therapy is a misguided word that messes up many. I've been going to walk in counselling for a decade. the problem I have that day is the problem I talk about or "unpack". that's it. no mystery. therapy is something that people psych themselves out for, or try to fit into their preconceived narrative of trying to fix themselves overall. walk in counselling does something different. At the end of the day, even if it didn't help or do anything, you can tell yourself you made a direct real attempt. sometimes that is enough to get you through to the next morning.

Finding the right therapist completely changed my life for the better. Don't be afraid to shop around until you find a therapist you feel comfortable talking to. Many offer a free zoom or phone call so you can get a sense of how you feel talking to them.
Wishing you all the best!