And sorry for those suffering societal misguided-energy frequencies cancer. Setting our own survival boundaries is often needful but we can still give ourselves and others the love energy frequency. That will never hurt, it will always be beneficial.

I'm finding out that when people are going to die and they know it they have a tendency to confess, make amends, a whole bunch of heavy stuff for the recipient of said confession or whatever. I am ambivalent about this as on one hand, they generally had a whole lot of time to make amends and didn't so why start now? On the other hand, it's healthy to forgive and forget but as I grow older it becomes more clear as to why priests hear confessions. They remove the burden the living would have to carry for the rest of their lives.

You sound like you’ve been through a lot and thus have learned a lot from the ex’s behaviour. It just plain sounds like they want an unpaid caregiver/ nurse. Really off putting when people push themselves into your life when they need something from you. Not because they’re interested in YOU. I would not get involved again. They’re ex’s for a reason.

Time to remove unwanted malignancy from the fertile warmth of your surroundings...
On the other side let's not let our rich imagination get the better of us. Perhaps then it may be time for, um, someone to go see the doctor

Where did you get the idea from OP’s confession that the ex was looking for a caretaker?? I read and reread that same confession and never got that impression.
Your assumption shows the way Your mind works not the OP’s ex’s intention.
But maybe you’ve had some bad experiences that make you quick to see negative possibilities.

They probably feel like it's the Universe's Karma catching up with them for needlessly messing with you like they did. They would be at least partly right on that account. They don't have what it takes to make it up to you, or to make it up to any other people they've potentially harmed besides you. The Universe on the other hand has what it takes and will make it up to everyone they've harmed.
For it to be on their behalf, and if they don't want to face the full extent and impending doom of their karma then they need to change their way of being, thinking, and doing and start making it up to the Universe on a broader scale. They can't play the Universe like they can those that are merely part of it. The Universe always knows. The Universe will never give them the gift that you are back to them especially when the Universe knows that they haven't truly changed in all the right ways and can't be trusted to truly care about you.

Try to here them out, be amicable. Show them your post on here. It could be a way for possible closure, either way / outcome. Life can be is short, make it meaningful...