Jack Black shouts out Vancouver’s Grouse Grind (and possibly disses Toronto) at the Golden Globes

by Mike Usinger on January 8th, 2024 at 10:35 AM

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Even as non-sequiturs go, it was something of a weird one, especially given that Jack Black hardly looks like the kind of guy committed to the great outdoors, healthy living, or exercise on any level. For which, on all fronts, we can totally respect and appreciate.

At yesterday’s Golden Globes Awards in Los Angeles, the veteran comedian and sometimes-musician was briefly stopped by eTalk’s Tyrone Edwards on the red carpet. Evidently aware on some level that Edwards is from Canada, Black used his 14-second interaction with eTalk to celebrate Vancouver.

“I like Canada,” Black said to Edwards. “Vancouver. Have you ever been to Vancouver?”

Before Edwards could start reeling off 153 reasons why Toronto is superior to everywhere else in the country, including the sad little backwater sometimes known as Lotusland, Black continued stream-of-consciousness style.

“Have you ever hiked up that mountain there?” asked the star of School of Rock, Kung Fu Panda, and The Super Mario Bros. Movie. “The Grouse Grinnnnnd.”

Edwards smartly decided to go with the Grouse Mountain angle instead of trying to steer the conversation to the CN Tower, Hockey Hall of Fame, or whatever else passes for a crown jewel in the self-proclaimed Centre of the Universe.

The eTalk host asked, “You’ve done the Grouse Grind?”

To which Black responded with, “You get to the top and you drink that smoothie.”

That was evidently a reference to Peak Juice Bar’s Grouse Grind Recovery smoothie, made with strawberry, banana, coconut milk, and plant protein. Either that, or a weed-based reward made with Tree Island yogurt, a can of Parallel 49 Craft Lager, and a quarter pound of Waffle Bites sativa by Cake and Cavier.

As for the grind itself, if Black in fact tackled it, he joins the ranks of celebrities Bradley Cooper, Hugh Jackman, Ryan Reynolds, Russell Crowe, and Matt Damon, all of whom have climbed the mountain’s 1.8-mile combination of natural rocks, tree roots, and man-made wooden steps.

For those who like comparing one thing (in this case, Vancouver) which has little in common with another (the rest of Canada), the Grouse Grind is roughly equivalent to 2,830 total stairs, whereas the Empire State Building has 1,860.

After his out-of-nowhere Vancouver shoutout was complete, Black then headed into the Globes ceremony, where he was nominated for Best Original Song for “Peaches” from the Super Mario Bros. Movie. He lost to “No Time to Die” from Barbie, sung, of course, by Billie Eilish—who would have probably, and rightly, listed Nardwuar as her favourite thing about Vancouver.